Frozen Smile

The true cause of Child Sexual Abuse

September 20th, 2013

An article was published today in a local newspaper about the worrying trend of child sexual abuse in Suriname. The numbers aren’t getting any lower with each year and sexual abuse now even occurs at soccer clubs and kindergartens according to the article. Of course sexual abuse is a worldwide problem of which not only children are victims, but also adults (both men and women). And for years now I’ve noticed that every time when such an article gets published, people’s reactions are basically the same. Most of the time they mention the need for more laws and regulations, harsher punishments, encourage violence against the perpetrators, etc. etc. Basically the kind of reactions you would expect from very primitive societies with primitive thinking people. It seems that we like to take care of the symptoms of most problems in society every time, but are afraid to look for and solve the underlying root causes — the only thing that can guarantee positive and lasting long term results.

People seldom take the time to think about what exactly is causing others to behave the way they do. We’re all products of our environment, and when our environment is working against us, we’re going to start to exhibit extreme and undesirable behavior. Think about it, why would anyone want to sexually abuse someone else? Hell, why would anyone want to sexually abuse a child?? The root causes are so blatantly obvious it baffles me every time when I see that people just don’t seem to realize it.

As human beings we all have a core set of basic needs ¹ that have to be satisfied in order to live a normal life. Those are our natural needs that we simply cannot ignore. One of those — arguably one of the most important — is the need for sexual satisfaction. Like I often mention in my articles, Dr. Sigmund Freud established the sexual desires as the primary motivating forces of human life. He also made clear in his research that we can expect dire consequences for an individual, and a society of individuals, if the sexual needs aren’t being satisfied adequately.

So in a society where there’s a lot of sexual repression, where women are programmed from very early childhood to withhold sex and to be very difficult with regard to their sexual needs, ² where religion encourages sexual suppression, and where people are very hypocritical about sex in general, it becomes very difficult for people to satisfy their sexual desires. And when this is the case, it eventually leads to violent behavior and sexual perversion. Men and women get sexually molested and raped, children get sexually abused by both men and women, and people start to develop more extreme and perverted sexual desires (such as homosexuality, pedophilia and incest). Even such issues as teen pregnancies and abortions are the result of sexual repression in society. ³

The only solution to these problems is for society to drastically change the way it treats sex. All of us need to acknowledge the sexual needs of every individual, regardless of their age, ⁴ and we have to be open about our sexual needs and treat it as a normal and natural part of life, which in fact it is. People should then be encouraged to satisfy their sexual desires whenever they feel like it, without fear of social repercussions and without any strings attached. As explained in the fifth part of my series on Understanding Women, especially women are being conditioned by society to suppress and repress their sexual desires. ⁵ And when we get to a point where there’s no sexual repression anymore in society and everyone can easily satisfy their sexual needs, then not only will the cases of sexual abuse in general drop significantly, but we’ll also solve a host of other problems in society as well.

No amount of laws and punishments are going to help if the root cause isn’t taken care of. Again, we have to stop treating symptoms and we have to start treating the underlying root problems in society. This exact same problem with our thinking can be seen in many other parts of life as well. For example the way people treat the issue of crime in society; they always propose the same “solutions” which are more laws and regulations, harsher punishments, violence against the perpetrators etc. etc. Nobody wants to analyze and understand what exactly drives people to become criminals. It’s like I mentioned in another article:

When it comes down to it, all we really need on this planet as human beings is food on the table every day and a roof over our heads. That’s basically all we really need to get us through our lives. After all these years, you would think that by now we’d all have figured this out already and have structured our societies in such a way where every human being on this planet could at the very least have access to those two things for his entire lifetime. But instead what we have is a constant struggle of people trying to have more than the other in order to stay on top in this system. Like crabs in a barrel. Everyone fighting for more and more, even if they have more than enough already, at the expense of others. As a result, we end up with a situation where the richest 1% of adults own 40% of global assets, where the richest 10% of adults own 85% of global assets, and where the bottom half of the adults own 1% of global wealth. Think about that for a moment. Then we go on asking ourselves why we’re dealing with so much crime. Nobody is born a criminal. Nobody really wants to be a criminal. Crime is just a symptom of our flawed society. When we create situations where a small group of people are hoarding all the resources on this planet, while a large group of people are struggling to survive every day (and in extreme cases are just outright being denied their basic rights), we shouldn’t act surprised when people start behaving in extreme ways in order to survive. And with this I’m not validating criminal behavior, but just saying that there’s a lot more to the problem and that we have to start looking at the root causes now instead of simply blaming the criminals while we fight the symptoms.

Another example is the world-wide problem with corruption. Like I explained in my article on Income Taxation, in a society that is fundamentally flawed and set up to enslave and manipulate people by attacking their right to life, we shouldn’t be surprised to find corrupt people everywhere. Faced with an attack on their right to life, people are going to behave in extreme ways in order to survive.

So people aren’t the issue; it’s the way our society is structured that causes issues and creates undesirable behavior. When we develop the intellectual awareness and the courage to start solving the root problems instead of the symptoms and transform our societies to be more supporting towards the individual and his basic needs, only then will we really solve problems for the long term and start to notice significant improvements.

Footnotes

For a detailed analysis of the basic needs of human beings I recommend checking out my post on the subject. All our basic needs are determined by nature itself and revolve around the continuation of life. And nothing is more important to the continuation of life than reproduction. Consequently, nothing is more threatening to the continuation of life than suppressing or repressing the sexual drives. Any individual faced with such a threat from his environment will naturally exhibit extreme and often violent reactions essentially out of self-preservation and self-defense. ↩︎
I recommend reading all 5 parts of my article series on Understanding Women for the details of why and how exactly women are brainwashed by society to repress their sexual desires. I also recommend my post on “Why men and women can’t be just friends” for examples of how women’s brainwash affects their relationships with men. ↩︎
From this article on Psychology Today:

Nothing inspires murderous mayhem in human beings more reliably than sexual repression. Denied food, water, or freedom of movement, people will get desperate and some may lash out at what they perceive as the source of their problems, albeit in a weakened state. But if expression of sexuality is thwarted, the human psyche tends to grow twisted into grotesque, enraged perversions of desire. Unfortunately, the distorted rage resulting from sexual repression rarely takes the form of rebellion against the people and institutions behind the repression. (If it did, perhaps we’d be reading of abused priests rather than priests as abusers.) Instead, the rage is generally directed at helpless victims who are sacrificed to the sick gods of guilt, shame, and ignorant pride.

With religion promoting sexual suppression, is it surprising that there are so many cases of child sexual abuse in churches everywhere? Regarding teen pregnancy, I’ve come across a few reported cases in the media where teen pregnancy was the result of fear, guilt and shame. In one case a girl was too afraid to talk openly to her parents about sex, and was afraid to ask her doctor for birth control thinking they might notify her parents. As a result she got pregnant. It wouldn’t surprise me if it turned out that the majority of teen pregnancy cases were to blame on similar issues, some of which are also mentioned below. ↩︎
Teaching children to stay away from sex, treating it as something mysterious that’s only for adults, and in the worst case, treating it as something that’s dirty or evil, has proven to be detrimental to their development. Society’s hypocritical stance to want to “protect children against sex” has an adverse influence on them instead. As Dr. Freud’s research established, even children have sexual desires that have to be satisfied in order for them to develop themselves in a healthy way. I’m also reminded of a story by futurist and social engineer Jacque Fresco, where he illustrates an extreme case of sexual suppression in a child (via religion) that resulted in an adult serial killer:

A guy’s name was Albert Fish. They believe he ate 40 children. And the public wanted to tear him to pieces or burn him alive. They were very bitter about it. A psychiatrist named Wertham. His name was Wertham. He said, “Don’t kill him. I want to try to find out what made him that way. So we can avoid those conditions in the future.” I like that guy. And here is what he found. When Albert Fish was eight years old, he was touching his private parts. His mother was an old time Baptist, good person. She came in and said, “You’re going to burn in hell touching that part of your body. That is satanic, and you will burn eternally.” She scared the shit out of the kid. And the mother said at 2:00 in the morning he was screaming. As she went into the bedroom he stuck needles into his genitals because he didn’t want to go to hell. Can you understand? Then he used to take minority kids into the woods and tried to cut their genitals off to save them from hell.

You can hear this in the interview below at around 1 hour and 25 minutes in. While few children will ultimately develop themselves in such an extreme way because of sexual repression, they are in fact being mentally damaged by it and they, and society in general, will have to deal with the adverse consequences later in life.

Also, do we really have to keep sending adult women to jail because of having sex with “under aged” boys? Isn’t it obvious that both the adult women and young boys are just healthy human beings wanting to satisfy their natural sexual needs? Where’s the harm in that? Especially when nobody is being manipulated or misled, they act out of their own free will and desires, and there’s love involved? Shouldn’t we instead help them and teach them how to be responsible with their needs? ↩︎
In the fifth part of my series on Understanding Women I discuss research done by University of Michigan psychology professor Terri Conley and her team of graduate students where they came to the following conclusion:

The research reviewed suggests that these gender differences are in fact rooted in much more mundane causes: stigma against women for expressing sexual desires; women’s socialization to attend to other’s needs rather than their own; and, more broadly, a double standard that dictates (different sets of) appropriate sexual behaviors for men and women.

I recommend reading the whole article for the details. ↩︎

Additional Notes

Came across this today:

Pedophilia Officially Classified as Sexual Orientation by American Psychiatric Association
A shocking announcement made by the American Psychiatric Association (APA) in its latest edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders caused an uproar among pro-family organizations and many others, as the APA states it now classifies pedophilia as a sexual orientation or preference instead of a disorder.

Sandy Rios, cultural expert and talk show host on the American Family Radio network, has issued a statement on behalf of the American Family Association in response to the APA’s position on pedophilia:

“Just as the APA declared homosexuality an ‘orientation’ under tremendous pressure from homosexual activists in the mid-’70s, now, under pressure from pedophile activists, they have declared the desire for sex with children an ‘orientation,’ too. It’s not hard to see where this will lead. More children will become sexual prey.

“Sanity will never return to this culture until truth is reclaimed. It is not now, nor has it ever been acceptable for men or women to desire sex with children. Any who struggle with this must at least know that it is wrong before they can combat it and seek change.”

Sanity will never return until we stop acting like hypocrites when it comes to our natural sexual needs, as explained in my post above. When women are trained to repress their sexual needs from early childhood, it shouldn’t surprise us when both men and women find other (often perverse) ways to satisfy their strong sexual urges.

It appears that an error was made and the APA did not classify pedophilia as a sexual orientation. From here:

The APA issued a statement to the press on Thursday, saying it had acted in “error,” and clarifying that the only difference in how pedophilia is referred to from the last DSM is that “the disorder name was changed from ‘pedophilia’ to ‘pedophilic disorder'” in order to “maintain consistency with the chapter’s other disorder listings.”

Added on October 31st, 2013 at 11:52 am
While this is happening, we wonder why children grow up to become frustrated adults who abuse children:

Six-year-old suspended for a kiss
First grader Hunter Yelton was not only suspended from school after kissing a girl he liked – and who apparently liked him back, according to the boy’s mother – but also accused of sexual harassment by Lincoln School of Science and Technology in Canon City, Colorado.

“It was during class yeah,” Hunter told local KRDO News. “We were doing reading group and I leaned over and kissed her on the hand. That’s what happened.”

“They sent me to the office, fair and square. I did something wrong and I feel sorry,” he added.

Jennifer Saunders, the boy’s mother, couldn’t believe what the school had done, especially since the children are reportedly “boyfriend and girlfriend.”

“That was the day I had the meeting with the principal, where she first said ‘sexual harassment,’” Saunders told KRDO. “This is taking it to an extreme that doesn’t need to be met with a six year old. Now my son is asking questions… what is sex mommy? That should not ever be said, sex. Not in a sentence with a six year old.”

According to Saunders, Hunter had been suspended before for poor behavior and for kissing the same girl on the cheek, but she said the show of affection wasn’t unwelcome. She added that she would “stand up and fight” for her son and argued the sexual harassment charge should be removed from Hunter’s official record.

Saunders also noted that the family has been trying to discipline Hunter and convince him to change his behavior at school.

However, the school district’s superintendent, Robin Gooldy, told HLN TV that Hunter’s record won’t follow him should he attend school in another district, and that any discipline will end when he stops touching other students. He noted that the girl’s parents have not complained about the incident.

…

Still, as the Associated Press reported, child psychologist Sandy Wurtele said kissing is normal behavior for kids at Hunter’s age, and that the school’s actions may negatively affect the child going forward. She added it’s only natural for kids to be curious about the differences between boys and girls.

Added on December 13th, 2013 at 12:21 pm
Here’s another example, showing that even young women can be driven to sexually abusing children. From a local newspaper in Suriname:

Toddler raped by neighbour
PARAMARIBO – Marvella P. may be sentenced to twelve months in prison for raping and threatening her four-year-old neighbor. […]

Marvella P. forced the boy to commit various kinds of sexual acts. This happened in the presence of his one year old sister. To prevent the victim from talking, he was threatened by Marvella. She told the boy that his mother would murder him if she found out.

Despite the threat, the toddler eventually told his mother. Marvella who was confronted with the story initially denied. […] Eventually she confessed abusing her neighbor to the police.

It’s not surprising that these situations occur given the barbaric societies that we live in around the world, that deny the fact that women and children also have sexual needs that need to be satisfied in order to live a healthy life.

Added on February 13th, 2014 at 7:16 pm
An interesting article was published on Spiegel Online showing that people were well aware in the past of the true purpose of sexual repression in society and how it affected children and adults:

The Sexual Revolution and Children: How the Left Took Things Too Far
Sexual liberation was at the top of the agenda of the young revolutionaries who, in 1967, began turning society upside down. The control of sexual desire was seen as an instrument of domination, which bourgeois society used to uphold its power. Everything that the innovators perceived as wrong and harmful has its origins in this concept: man’s aggression, greed and desire to own things, as well as his willingness to submit to authority. The student radicals believed that only those who liberated themselves from sexual repression could be truly free.

‘Hostile Treatment of Sexual Pleasure’

To them, it seemed obvious that liberation should begin at an early age. Once sexual inhibitions had taken root, they reasoned, everything that followed was merely the treatment of symptoms. They were convinced that it was much better to prevent those inhibitions from developing in the first place. Hardly any leftist texts of the day did not address the subject of sexuality.

For instance, “Revolution der Erziehung” (“The Revolution in Education”), a work published by Rowohlt in 1971, which quickly became a bestseller, addresses sexuality as follows: “The de-eroticization of family life, from the prohibition of sexual activity among children to the taboo of incest, serves as preparation for total assimilation — as preparation for the hostile treatment of sexual pleasure in school and voluntary subjugation to a dehumanizing labor system.”

The article claims that “the left took things too far”, but actually the left were on to something very important — one of the truths of life that has been hidden from humanity in order to frustrate, divide and control us. Dr. Freud’s research showed this, as well as Dr. Willhelm Reich as detailed in his book The Sexual Revolution. This is what Reich said:

“Sexual suppression supports the power of the Church, which has sunk very deep roots into the exploited masses by means of sexual anxiety and guilt. It engenders timidity towards authority and binds children to their parents. This results in adult subservience to state authority and to capitalistic exploitation. It paralyzes the intellectual critical powers of the oppressed masses because it consumes the greater part of biological energy. Finally, it paralyzes the resolute development of creative forces and renders impossible the achievement of all aspirations for human freedom. In this way the prevailing economic system (in which single individuals can easily rule entire masses) becomes rooted in the psychic structures of the oppressed themselves.”

Also see part 3 of my Understanding Women articles for details.

Added on February 17th, 2014 at 12:55 pm
Here’s another interesting article on the subject of child abuse, that discusses the fact that researchers “could not prove sex with children does them harm”:

‘We can’t prove sex with children does them harm’ says Labour-linked NCCL
Today we publish extracts from an NCCL report written for the Criminal Law Revision Committee in 1976 when Mrs Hewitt was general secretary.

It says: “Where both partners are aged 10 or over, but under 14, a consenting sexual act should not be an offence. As the age of consent is arbitrary, we propose an overlap of two years on either side of 14.

“Childhood sexual experiences, willingly engaged in, with an adult result in no identifiable damage.

“The Criminal Law Commission should be prepared to accept the evidence from follow-up research on child ‘victims’ which show there is little subsequent effect after a child has been ‘molested’.

“The real need is a change in the attitude which assumes that all cases of paedophilia result in lasting damage.

“The present legal penalties are too high and reinforce the misinformation and prejudice. The duty of the court should be to inquire into all the relevant circumstances with the intention, not of meting out severe punishment, but of determining the best solution in the interests of both child and paedophile.”

Added on March 12th, 2014 at 3:59 pm
Things are only getting worse in Suriname according to this article published in local newspaper “De Ware Tijd”. These are the kinds of things that happen in a sexually repressed society, where people are encouraged and brainwashed from childhood to want to own their partners in exclusive relationships and marriage, and where there’s a lot of hypocrisy surrounding our natural sexual needs.

“De meldingen van huiselijk geweld zijn de afgelopen vijf jaren nooit zo hoog geweest als in 2014. Het afgelopen jaar heeft het Korps Politie Suriname 1848 gevallen geregistreerd. Dat zijn er ongeveer 400 meer dan in 2013. Ook zedendelicten zijn in de afgelopen vijf jaren nog nooit zo hoog geweest als in 2014. In het jaarverslag van de politie staan 807 gevallen opgetekend.”

Added on January 8th, 2015 at 1:59 pm
Looks like there’s progress in some countries. The Guardian reports:

Porn belongs in the classroom, says Danish professor
A leading sexologist in Denmark has called for pornography to be shown in the classroom, claiming that starting a debate about the industry could help teenagers become “conscientious and critical consumers” who are able to tell the difference between pornography and the reality of sexual relationships.

…

“We know from research that a vast majority of teenagers have seen porn at an early age – so it’s not a question of introducing youngsters to porn,” he added. According to one Nordic study, 99% of boys and 86% of girls in Scandinavia have already seen pornographic films by the time they’re 16. What Graugaard wants is to make sure teens “possess the necessary skills to view porn constructively”.

“We should strengthen their ability to distinguish between the media’s depictions of the body and sex and the everyday life of an average teenager. They should become conscientious and critical consumers.”

…

“We want our kids to have exciting and gratifying sex lives, so an open-minded, constructive dialogue is the best way to make sure that they are able to make meaningful decisions for themselves.”

…

He added: “It’s not our job to scare off teenagers, rather we should encourage them to explore the joys of sexuality in a safe way and on their own terms – instead of turning our backs on them.”

Added on March 17th, 2015 at 5:49 pm
An interesting article on De Correspondent, asking “It’s absolutely normal for children aged one and a half to masturbate. But why doesn’t anyone know that?” (May 25th, 2016):

But if you ask about the state of sexual awareness, you’re asking the wrong question, says pedagogue Channah Zwiep (53). The question should really be: how is the sex education of young children?

If sex education only happens in high school, it is too late according Zwiep. Sex education is – in addition to technical information – also about dealing with intimacy, bonding and trust in regard to dealing with physical/bodily contact and ideally starts at birth.

…

“This ignorance about sex education, along with the media coverage of incidents of child sexual abuse, have contributed to a fairly hysterical society where the atmosphere is quite tense when it comes to children and sexuality,” Zwiep says. Parents and guardians are geared towards oversignaling. “If a preschooler is curious about the penis of a classmate, educators get scared to death.”

…

This while everyone should know that it suits the development of children when they masturbate at one and a half years old according Zwiep. For example, they discover that it feels good when they rub against a big stuffed animal.

For details about the devastating consequences that sexual repression and suppression has on children, I can highly recommend the book “Children of the Future: On the Prevention of Sexual Pathology” by Dr. Wilhelm Reich.

In this gathering of his writing on children, Wilhelm Reich demonstrates the impact of the environment of the infant, showing how it can warp the child’s development. He points particularly to how disastrous the exclusion of genitality is to the child.

Added on May 30th, 2016 at 11:07 am
In a publication in Pedagogiek “Seks tussen volwassenen en kinderen – wat is daar mis mee?” (2009), prof. Jan Willem Sleutel of the University of Amsterdam mentions the following:

En Schmidt (2002, p. 473) beweert meer in het algemeen dat het verschil in macht tussen volwassenen en kinderen “endangers the child’s capacity for sexual self-determination, threatening to overpower it completely”.

…

Omdat de term ‘child sexual abuse’ een duidelijk verband suggereert met het optreden van schade, moet de term worden gereserveerd voor alleen die gevallen van seks tussen volwassenen en kinderen waarbij dat verband ook daadwerkelijke aanwezig is, en dus niet worden toegepast op gevallen waarbij dat verband met psychopathologische aandoeningen volledig ontbreekt – daarvoor kunnen we dan beter de term ‘adult-child sex’ gebruiken.
Hoe dan ook, als we mogen aannemen dat de resultaten van het onderzoek van Rind cum suis betrouwbaar zijn5, dan valt het schadeargument niet langer te handhaven. Volgens de tweede premisse van dat argument gaan in feite alle gevallen van seks tussen volwassenen en kinderen gepaard met een reëel risico op schade voor het kind. Maar uit het beschreven onderzoek blijkt dat die reële kans op schade in feite alleen aanwezig is wanneer het seksuele contact van de kant van het kind onvrijwillig is. Die onvrijwilligheid brengt met zich mee dat het kind de seks negatief zal beleven en vormt bovendien (en wellicht ook daarom) een significant risico op psychische stoornissen. Als echter het contact van de kant van het kind vrijwillig wordt aangegaan, mag worden aangenomen dat het kind het contact eerder positief dan negatief zal ervaren, en ontbreekt elk significant verband met psychopathologische aandoeningen.

Translated to English:

And Schmidt (2002, p. 473) claims more generally that the difference in power between adults and children “endangers the child’s capacity for sexual self-determination, threatening to overpower it completely”.

…

Since the term ‘child sexual abuse’ suggests a clear link with the occurrence of damage, the term should be reserved for only those cases of sex between adults and children where this connection is also actually present, and therefore can not be applied to cases where the connection with psychopathological disorders is completely missing – there we should use the term “adult-child sex”.
Anyway, if we can assume that the results of the research of Rind are cum suis reliable, then the damage claim cannot be maintained. According to the second premise of this argument all cases of sex between adults and children are accompanied by a real risk of harm to the child. But the described research shows that the real risk of harm is in fact only present when the sexual contact is involuntary on the part of the child. That involuntariness implies that the child will experience the sex negatively and will in addition (and perhaps therefore) be a significant risk for the development of psychological disorders. However, if the sexual contact is entered into voluntarily by the child, it may be assumed that the child will experience it positively rather than negatively, and that any significant connection with psychopathological disorders won’t be present.

So we see that there’s enough research showing that children who have sex with adults on a completely voluntary basis, don’t get damaged and in fact end up having a positive experience. This makes sense, because as long as there’s no coercion or manipulation, and nobody is being mislead in any way (as long as there’s respect for everyone’s right to life), there’s absolutely nothing wrong with two people having sex, regardless of age.

Children have sexual needs too (they get born with it, as Freud and Reich established based on their research), and we shouldn’t stand in the way of them satisfying their sexual desires. If we do, then we “endanger the child’s capacity for sexual self-determination” and, we interfere with the self-regulation (as Reich called it) of the organism which can only have serious negative consequences in the long term (see Reich’s research).

This is why I don’t agree with Sleutel’s conclusion, where he basically states that parents should prevent their child from having sex with adults, because he’s contradicting himself. On the one hand he argues that adults should not abuse their power and authority to force or mislead a child into having sex with them, but on the other hand he recommends that adults (ab)use their power and authority to prevent the child from satisfying their sexual desires. In both cases adults are forcing their will onto the child, violating the child’s right to life. As Sleutel himself mentions, this “endangers the child’s capacity for sexual self-determination, threatening to overpower it completely”.

So the best approach is to respect the right to life of every child, acknowledging their basic needs (including the important sexual needs), and allowing them the freedom to satisfy those needs and experiment with their sexuality in complete freedom, with whomever they choose. The only thing we should do as adults, is guide them with information starting at a very early age, while teaching them how to experiment with their sexuality in a safe and responsible manner. Repression and suppression will only lead to psychological damage, and that will lead to a society filled with psychopaths, as we can currently observe everywhere around the world.

Added on June 1st, 2016 at 10:39 am
I saw an article yesterday titled “18+ Only|The Trobrianders : The Culture Where Kids Start Having Sex At 7 – Papua, New Guinea” discussing the sexuality among the Trobiander culture. Here’s a quote:

Girls want sex just as much as guys, and kids start having sex at a very young age — 6-8 for the girls and 10-12 for the guys — with no social stigma.
They change partners often. Women are just as assertive and dominant as men in pursuing or refusing a lover. This is not only allowed but encouraged. There are few customs about dating to inhibit “hooking up” and, of course, revealing clothing has been taken to its limit, with girls actually going topless. However, everybody have sex whenever they want.

In the Trobriand Islands, there is no traditional marriage ceremony. A young woman stays in her lover’s house instead of leaving it before sunrise. The man and woman sit together in the morning and wait for the bride’s mother to bring them cooked yams.

This is similar to what Wilhelm Reich discusses in his book “The Invasion of Compulsory Sex Morality” where he looks at the work of Malinowski who lived with and studied the Trobianders for a while.

This shows again that sexual suppression and repression in current societies around the world has nothing to do with the natural order. Children also have their own sexuality and sexual needs (they are born with it like every organism), and should be allowed to freely express that, just like in the Trobiander culture. And Reich discusses in his book the many benefits that this ultimately has for the individual as they grow up, and for society.

Added on January 13th, 2017 at 9:50 am
The fact that sexual suppression and repression in society is one of the primary causes of child sexual abuse is also evident from what happens in monasteries around the world. Most people these days are probably familiar with the many scandals concerning child sexual abuse in the Catholic Church.

Professor of Anthropology, Emeritus, of Princeton University, Gananath Obeyesekere, writes in “Child ordinations and the rights of children”:

The more serious problem is that of sexual abuse notoriously associated with all forms of institutionalized monasticism, witness the recent cases of abuse of children put in their pastoral care even by high prelates of the Catholic Church. But Catholics have no system of child ordination and therefore the possibility of abuse of children confined to Buddhist monasteries must be faced honestly and squarely.

Here’s what happens in Tibetan monasteries:

Tibetan monks have worked out a system of mutual masturbation, that Heinrich Harrer first reported on, but since then, others have as well, including a former gelug monk in the first edition of “The Book of Tibetan Elders”. Monks also jump over the monastery walls at night to see sex workers. Sexual abuse of child novices is reportedly widespread in Sri Lanka and Tibetan monasteries, and occurs in Taiwan as well, where occasionally court cases result.

And from “Child abuse in Tibetan Buddhist Monasteries” by Lama Shree Narayan Singh:

Heinrich Harrer in Seven Years in Tibet too states categorically that the monks in the Potala are homosexual whilst also mentioning the terror of dob-dobs, the monk-thugs, in Lhasa .
Recently a journalist investigating the phenomenon of Tibetan Buddhism, stumbled across some alarming evidence concerning paedophilia in a Tibetan monastery.

…

The monastery he had gone to was a den of vice, even though it claimed to be of the Gelugpa persuasion – ‘those who uphold virtue’. The Dalai Lama is the head of this tradition!

What transpired is briefly as follows: Every night the elder monks would entice the novice monks away from their beds offering them sweets and then rape – sodomise — them to their hearts’ content, overpowering any resistance the young ones would put up. Throughout the nights the monastery would be filled with the subdued sobbing of these unwilling victims of sexual lust.

…

This is institutionalised as ‘helenkos’ in Afghan society where apparently certain tribes gradually, through insertion of progressive larger pieces of rounded wood into the rectum of young boys, prepare them for their mission later on in life. In one interview published in a newspaper, an Afghan adult admitted that he indulged himself in this way due to their sheer availability, due to the separation of sexes in society.

…

This writer has also come to know about what is referred to as ‘the peculiarly Tibetan mode of homosexuality’ mentioned in the review above. In fact, it forms the rite of passage into the noviceate. Fortunately the process is non-penetrative and could be termed as a sophisticated form of masturbation where the gap between the groins serves as the make-believe. This can also take the form of mutual gratification through an interchange in the missionary position!
In fact it is said in these monasteries that one must practise this to be and remain a ‘good monk’. The young are invariably abused and receive favors of various kinds from their active partners in the form of cash and so on becoming de facto ‘monastic sex workers’.

…

Sex being such a fundamental human drive, it is only natural to expect that each and every monk could not possibly be purely celibate. Males are naturally aggressive as is well known.

…

This practice, termed “monks’ custom”, between consenting adults however, seems to have existed in Tibet from the days of the Buddhist founding fathers.

Notice from the above quote how sexual suppression and repression resulted in homosexuality and child abuse.

Finally, here’s from a young Buddhist monk himself; from The Guardian, “The YouTube confessional sending shockwaves through the Buddhist world” (March 9th 2012):

He is 21, a handsome, charismatic Tibetan who describes being a lama as his job. He is passionately keen on music, he raps, break-dances and parties in capital cities around the globe. Kalu Rinpoche chronicles his moods, his existential angst, his activities and philosophical insights on Facebook – and he recently broke the most profoundly entrenched Tibetan Buddhist taboo with a confessional video that received more than 23,000 hits on YouTube.

…

In his confessional video, young Kalu says the traumatic events he experienced during his teenage years started after his father died when he was nine.
He relates how he was moved to a different monastery and at the age of 12 was sexually abused by older monks. He goes on to reveal that when he refused to obey instructions, his tutor tried to kill him.

“It was all about money, power and control,” he says.

Added on January 13th, 2017 at 10:39 am
From an article on Russia Today (RT), “Over 4,000 children alleged victims of Catholic Church sex abuse in Australia since 1980 – probe” (February 6th 2017):

More than 4,000 children, mostly boys, were allegedly sexually abused by Catholic priests in Australia over decades, an investigation says, adding that since the 1950s some 7 percent of priests in the country were alleged perpetrators.

The report was released on Monday by the Australian Royal Commission into Institutional Responses to Child Sexual Abuse.

…

The investigation analyzed all types of claims of sexual abuse, including against former priests, “religious brothers or sisters, or any other person employed in or appointed to a voluntary position by a Catholic Church authority.”

“Between January 1980 and February 2015, 4,444 people alleged incidents of child sexual abuse made to 93 Catholic Church authorities. These claims related to over 1,000 separate institutions,” the report says.

The commission was established back in 2013 to investigate instances and allegations of child sexual abuse in Australia.
The majority of victims were male (78 percent) and 22 percent were female, according to the report.
The average age of the claimants at the time of the alleged abuse was 10 and a half for girls and 11.6 years old for boys. The average time between the actual abuse and the claim was some 33 years, it was reported.

The commission managed to identify 1,880 alleged perpetrators, who included 597 (32 percent) ‘religious brothers,’ 572 (30 percent) priests, 543 (29 percent) lay people and 96 (5 percent) ‘religious sisters.’ At least 90 percent of the alleged perpetrators were male, the report says.

Added on February 6th, 2017 at 8:47 pm
Here’s from an article on St. Lucia Times, “Female Sex Predators In Jamaica Targeting Young Boys” (May 7th 2019):

The Jamaica Observer spoke with several adult men who recounted their first time having sex, most of whom did not consider their encounters as sexual abuse.

According to one 30-year-old who is now the father of two children, he had sex for the first time at 12 years old with his aunt, who was babysitting him.
“I didn’t know what was going on. It was just like, ‘Oh, anybody ever touched you there before?’ I said, ‘No’. She said: ‘Do you want me to?’. I said, ‘I don’t know’, and she did. “And just as the act was going on, she was like, ‘I think you would like it’. So I didn’t see it as abuse,” the father of two recounted. “I was coerced into doing it and after it happened I got addicted to sex… especially during my teenage years… I wanted to have sex as often as I could and I wanted to try new things and was almost insatiable at the time for women,” he shared. “It was not until later on that I realized what really happened to me.”

He said that while in high school, boys would trade stories about their sexual encounters, and quite a few of his friends shared that their first time was with their domestic helper or a relative. “It was almost common, and [back] then, it was seen like a bragging right. But it was not until I was at university that I recognized that this was abuse,” he said, adding that as a parent, he limits the people who are allowed to babysit his children.

One 62-year-old shared that he lost his virginity at age 14 to a woman who was in her 20s. He, too, did not think he was sexually abused, but viewed the experience as an encounter that led to sexual satisfaction.

Another man, who is now 31 years old, told the Observer that he first had sexual intercourse at age 17 with a woman who was 21 years old. He also did not consider it sexual abuse or sexual exploitation and today credits his level of experience and sexual prowess to that early exposure.

This supports other findings noted above showing that “childhood sexual experiences, willingly engaged in, with an adult result in no identifiable damage.” It’s society’s brainwash that sometimes lets them think otherwise later.

As also noted above, Rind’s research “shows that the real risk of harm is in fact only present when the sexual contact is involuntary on the part of the child.”

Also interesting to note from the article that older women also turn to “children” for sex, and that they are also arrested even when their partner’s participation was voluntary and they also enjoyed it:

BETWEEN 2013 and 2018, a total of 22 women were arrested for having sexual intercourse with boys under 16 years old. At the same time, 129 boys under the age of 16 were the victims of sexual assault for the same period.

In fact, according to data from the Jamaica Constabulary Force’s (JCF’s) Statistics and Information Management Unit, between 2013 and 2018 a total of 53 females were arrested for sexual assault, of which 33 were arrested for the offence of sexual intercourse with a victim under the age of 16.

Also, up to March 9 this year, one female has been arrested for having sexual intercourse with a male under 16 years old.

Added on May 12th, 2019 at 7:48 pm

Comments

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Sharon Mather September 21st, 2013 at 7:10 am

Karel, reading your blogs always inspires me, for the simple fact, you open up the real issues with extreme honesty. As well as that, it is obvious much thought goes into your writing, which I believe is also well researched. Now this is good writing, well researched and thorough.
As co-founder for VOWW/voices for women and children worldwide, we represent the voiceless women and children, creating online blogs, written stories and film, to highlight ways to repair and find solutions.
You are quite correct in your reasoning, we think alike in many ways.
I recently wrote to “Women Under Siege”, Lauren Wolfe is the writer, they deal predominantly in sexual abuse, violence towards women and children, offering my services to help in dismantling this plague sweeping our world, rape and violence.
Having researched many issues, including the issue of sexual frustration men and women experience, with the possible connection to their religious upbringing of suppression and abstinence, and the dire consequences of this, I criticised their belief that they could end rape in 2013, a completely rediculous presumption in my view, and the very fact they claim to be such experts. This was met very negatively by them, their refusal to collaborate with others and to come to the reality, that indeed it cannot be solved, however if we approach these issues as you have, truthfully and with great thought, the possibility of rehabilitating these issues for change, has a small glimmer of hope.
For years I have spoken your exact words, to everyone who had the intellect to listen or reason, about our most basic desires not being met, many have refused to acknowledge the causes, why??
We have a very long way to go, to understand the basic desires and needs of male/female relations never mind solving the issues. But we can start by highlighting these fundamental issues of suppressions.
We could talk about this forever, but I wanted to thank you for your clarity of thought on these important issues.
As writers, we are in a prime position to educate on the truth, why not all collaborate together on vital pointers for change.
Strength in numbers, surely there have to be more out there, who understand what the “real problems” are.
I hope you don’t mind if I post your article on VOWW
Many thanks Karel, I really enjoy your mind
Sharon Mather

Reply
- Karel Donk September 21st, 2013 at 1:28 pm
  
  Thanks for the compliments and I’m glad you like the article Sharon 🙂
  
  Having researched many issues, including the issue of sexual frustration men and women experience, with the possible connection to their religious upbringing of suppression and abstinence, and the dire consequences of this, I criticised their belief that they could end rape in 2013, a completely rediculous presumption in my view, and the very fact they claim to be such experts.
  
  The fact that they think they can easily end this in 2013 shows they don’t fully understand the problem. Even if we were to implement the solution I wrote about, it will take at least 2 generations for significant recovery. Like you mentioned, most people living right now are so mentally damaged and frustrated by society that reprogramming their minds is next to impossible. Most people can’t get rid of society’s brainwash which they were exposed to since early childhood. You can try to change their minds, but I think the focus should be more on the younger generation, to prevent them from making the same mistakes. This is why it’s important to get this information out there because many people will be looking for it, especially when they see that the old ways aren’t working for them.
  
  For years I have spoken your exact words, to everyone who had the intellect to listen or reason, about our most basic desires not being met, many have refused to acknowledge the causes, why??
  
  Most of the time it’s the fact that they’re under influence of the brainwash they received. Once the brain has been programmed in a certain way with certain information, it’s not easy to deprogram it unless people have been taught the skills of how to do this. I discuss this in a footnote in this article. They’re often also very dependent on the status quo and want to remain politically correct for various reasons, which include acceptance by society, to keep receiving their funding, etc. etc. I wrote about this in my article on politically correctness. People are too afraid to rock the boat. We’re all being conditioned from early childhood to conform to society instead of questioning things too much.
  
  You have my permission to repost my article on your own website, if you just mention the writer and link back to my original page here 🙂
  
  Reply
Sharon Mather September 21st, 2013 at 4:50 pm

Thank you Karel..I have posted and I always mention the writer as well as attach links.
Yes the conditioned mind and conformity.
Another story altogether, but one worth tackling. As with all religions, brainwashing to belief systems, makes sure everyone stays in line. The armies of the world have this down to a tee. As a great believer in the youth for change, as the only viable option for the future, educating them firstly, is of dire importance, that they may in turn change, what has become a very unhappy and dangerous world with a sad and limited future for them.
Pressure is on the youth now, to refuse to conform, of course this will take a few generations, but the possibilities through world wide net are there, they are more informed, and they are denouncing old belief systems and family tradition based on conformity. My work within these areas are showing hope. Small pockets of hope, but hope never the less.
Keep up the interest Karel.

Reply
- Karel Donk September 21st, 2013 at 8:00 pm
  
  Yep I agree, the youth now has a great opportunity to really change the course of things thanks to the Global Brain. Tesla predicted this would happen and would help us solve many problems once and for all. It’ll take time though, and we shouldn’t expect results in our lifetimes. Even Tesla used to say that the work he did was for the future, not necessarily his own generation (who didn’t understand most of what he was saying anyway).
  
  Reply
marnix October 31st, 2013 at 2:18 pm

Ik vind het bovenstaande verhaal helaas weer net teveel doorslaan naar de andere kant: in plaats van de individu is ‘alles weer de schuld van de maatschappij’ en de overheid als vertegenwoordiger van die maatschappij moet maar een oplossing zien zoeken voor de problemen. Een maatschappij is echter niets anders als een verzameling individuen. Natuurlijk zullen dergelijke problemen niet alleen aan het indvidu liggen en zal de opvoeding en dergelijke ook altijd een rol spelen, maar veel van ons handelen en denken is juist genetisch. Veel van ons gedrag is aangeboren. En dus ook het sociaal onwenselijk gedrag. Een goed voorbeeld hiervan kun je terug vinden in de film “les un et les autres. Corruptie krijgt niet alleen een kans wanneer mensen moeten struggelen en’nemen’ waar ze recht op hebben, maar corruptie ontstaat ook door hebzucht en krijgt juist een kans door een gebrek aan geintstitutionaliseerde controle. Ondanks die controle zal er toch corruptie zijn. Mensen zijn nu eenmaal inventief als het om geld gaat. rijke landen met een enorme stricte controle hebben toch te maken met corruptie. dat valt dus niet uit te bannen. Ook wat sexuele voorkeuren betreft zal er altijd misbruik zijn. er zullen altijd mensen zijn die anderen willen misbruiken al dan niet ten eigen bate dan wel lust. Ook hier speelt de pakkans een heel grote rol, maar inderdaad zal dat alleen niet voldoende zijn. het argument dat alles wat met deze ‘misbruikende’ mannen/vrouwen aan de hand is, terug te herleiden is tot ‘sexuele repressie van de vrouw’ is niet steekhoudend. In suriname bijvoorbeeld of eigenlijk wel in ieder land, kun je overal prostitues dan wel ‘vrije’ partners vinden. Kennelijk gaat het dus helemaal niet om het al dan niet beschikbaar zijn van sexpartners, maar ook om heel andere zaken. repressie is misschien 1 van de oorzaken, maar kan nooit DE oorzaak zijn. Dit soort sexueel gefrustreerden zijn mijn inziens juist mensen die last hebben of geboren zijn met heel andere psychische problemen. necrofilie, pedofilie, bestofilie en noem maar op geloof ik helemaal niets van dat dit komt omdat vrouwen ‘kieskeurig’ en terughoudend zouden zijn in de keuze van hun partner en daarom vele mannen ‘sexueel gefrustreerd’ laten rondlopen. Ook duizenden jaren geleden kwamen al deze perverse zaken al voor onder meer bij de romeinen en in die tijd was (openlijke) sex juist een heel normaal en maatschappelijk geaccepteerd verschijnsel zonder taboes. als uw redenering zou kloppen dan is iedereen onschuldig,want achter elk ‘strafbaar’ feit gaat wel 1 of ander zielige jeugd schuil. Mijn wedervraag gaat dan zijn: hoe zit het dan met al die mensen die ook een zielige jeugd gehad hebben en niet overgegaan zijn tot een dergelijk defiant gedrag ?

Reply
- Karel Donk October 31st, 2013 at 5:34 pm
  
  Ik vind het bovenstaande verhaal helaas weer net teveel doorslaan naar de andere kant: in plaats van de individu is ‘alles weer de schuld van de maatschappij’ en de overheid als vertegenwoordiger van die maatschappij moet maar een oplossing zien zoeken voor de problemen.
  
  De mens is het product van zijn omgeving voor een belangrijk deel. Een verziekte maatschappij levert zieke mensen. En dat de maatschappij verziekt is, is duidelijk. Haast alle structuren en de hele wijze waarop de maatschappij is opgezet werken tegen ons. Niet alleen op dit gebied, maar op vele anderen. Lees bijvoorbeeld mijn artikel over de Inkomstenbelasting en de effecten die dat heeft op de mens. Je haalde corruptie aan; in dat artikel bespreek ik de werkelijke bron van corruptie.
  
  Ik heb verder nooit gezegd dat de overheid een oplossing voor moet vinden. Juist zeg ik dat wij allemaal bepaalde dingen nu moeten gaan inzien en anders gaan aanpakken. Zoals je zelf heel correct opmerkt is de maatschappij een verzameling van individuen. Die individuen moeten nu ophouden met bang zijn, met hypocrieten zijn, en moeten nu hoofdoorzaken willen aanpakken ipv symptomen willen blijven bestrijden.
  
  het argument dat alles wat met deze ‘misbruikende’ mannen/vrouwen aan de hand is, terug te herleiden is tot ‘sexuele repressie van de vrouw’ is niet steekhoudend. In suriname bijvoorbeeld of eigenlijk wel in ieder land, kun je overal prostitues dan wel ‘vrije’ partners vinden. Kennelijk gaat het dus helemaal niet om het al dan niet beschikbaar zijn van sexpartners, maar ook om heel andere zaken.
  
  Ja je kan prostitues vinden maar dat kost veel geld. Niet een ieder kan dagelijks $50 neertellen voor sex. Was het zo dat vrouwen vrijer waren met sex, en geen onrealistische eisen zouden stellen welke het gevolg zijn van maatschappelijke brainwash op het gebied van sex en relaties, dan zouden mannen en vrouwen veel makkelijker aan hun trekken kunnen komen. En wat betreft ‘vrije’ partners, dat hangt af van waar je woont. In Nederland is men wat vrijer misschien, maar in Suriname is men juist vanwege de sexual repression in de maatschappij erg beperkt. En dat is zelfs in de VS ook zo. Ik bespreek deze issues uitvoerig in deel 4 en deel 5 van mijn Understanding Women serie. Door al die regels waar men (voornamelijk vrouwen) zich aan moet houden is het vinden van een ‘vrije’ partner haast onmogelijk.
  
  Dit soort sexueel gefrustreerden zijn mijn inziens juist mensen die last hebben of geboren zijn met heel andere psychische problemen.
  
  Je wordt niet ermee geboren maar het wordt je ‘geleerd’ bij de opvoeding. Een verkeerde opvoeding resulteert in gefrustreerde mensen. Fresco legt dat uit in het interview welke ik boven gelinked heb.
  
  Ook duizenden jaren geleden kwamen al deze perverse zaken al voor onder meer bij de romeinen en in die tijd was (openlijke) sex juist een heel normaal en maatschappelijk geaccepteerd verschijnsel zonder taboes.
  
  We zitten al duizenden jaren opgescheept met deze problemen. Kijk maar naar de bijbel, naar de verhalen in de oude testament bvb. Ook bij de romeinen had je sexual repression en waren heel wat dingen taboe. Dingen die nu niet taboe meer zijn maar toen wel. En wat toen niet taboe was, is dat nu wel. Zo heb je verschillen in wat wel en niet mocht, maar sexual repression was er wel.
  
  als uw redenering zou kloppen dan is iedereen onschuldig,want achter elk ‘strafbaar’ feit gaat wel 1 of ander zielige jeugd schuil.
  
  Ja dat klopt, we moeten ophouden met de schuld geven aan mensen en moeten nu de hoofdoorzaken aanpakken. Niet de mens is het probleem, maar het is het systeem waarin hij leeft dat de mens aanzet tot extreem gedrag. Dit zelfde haal ik ook aan in eerder genoemde artikel over de Inkomstenbelasting:
  
  As a society we have to finally start admitting that all of us are responsible for creating a lot of these issues and we have to stop trying to combat the symptoms and instead focus on the root causes! We shouldn’t be making laws against corruption, or impose higher fines as if the people are the problem; instead we must make this system vanish from our society. Otherwise it’s already clear according to history what our fate will ultimately be, i.e. total destruction. Nobody is born a criminal; it’s our society and the systems that we use within our society that creates criminals.
  
  In een ander artikel haal ik ook hetzelfde aan:
  
  After all these years, you would think that by now we’d all have figured this out already and have structured our societies in such a way where every human being on this planet could at the very least have access to those two things for his entire lifetime. But instead what we have is a constant struggle of people trying to have more than the other in order to stay on top in this system. Like crabs in a barrel. Everyone fighting for more and more, even if they have more than enough already, at the expense of others. As a result, we end up with a situation where the richest 1% of adults own 40% of global assets, where the richest 10% of adults own 85% of global assets, and where the bottom half of the adults own 1% of global wealth. Think about that for a moment. Then we go on asking ourselves why we’re dealing with so much crime. Nobody is born a criminal. Nobody really wants to be a criminal. Crime is just a symptom of our flawed society. When we create situations where a small group of people are hoarding all the resources on this planet, while a large group of people are struggling to survive every day (and in extreme cases are just outright being denied their basic rights), we shouldn’t act surprised when people start behaving in extreme ways in order to survive. And with this I’m not validating criminal behavior, but just saying that there’s a lot more to the problem and that we have to start looking at the root causes now instead of simply blaming the criminals while we fight the symptoms.
  
  En wat betreft uw vraag:
  
  Mijn wedervraag gaat dan zijn: hoe zit het dan met al die mensen die ook een zielige jeugd gehad hebben en niet overgegaan zijn tot een dergelijk defiant gedrag ?
  
  Een ieder ontwikkelt zich anders afhankelijk van de unieke omstandigheden waarin hij zich bevindt. En sexual repression bvb kan bij een ieder een andere uitwerking hebben welke meer of minder extreem kan zijn. Het zal steeds weer afhangen van de unieke omstandigheden waarin ze opgroeien. Maar dat hun ‘zielige jeugd’ invloed zal hebben op hun gedrag is een gegeven. Iemand kan bvb als gevolg daarvan overgaan tot verkrachting of kindermisbruik, maar iemand anders weer reageert het anders af op zijn omgeving door moeilijk, gemeen en irrationeel gedrag. In mijn Understanding Women artikel bijvoorbeeld laat ik zien hoe het irrationeel en vaak onbegrijpelijke en onverklaarbare gedrag van vrouwen simpelweg te wijten is aan sexual repression of suppression. Dat is hoe zij er over het algemeen mee om gaan.
  
  Reply
Sharon Mather October 31st, 2013 at 3:46 pm

Scary and perverse stuff indeed.
What bothers me more than this statement of “acceptability of pedophilia” as a sexual preference rather than a disease, (which it most definitely is), is this latest “defining to try to justify a sick sexual greed”.
For goodness sake, where are we heading?, it makes one wonder whether the American Psychiatric Association is run by some of these sickos?, to define something of such an evil magnitude, as pedophilia “within the boundaries of normal”, is jus in my view,t un- acceptable.
This coming from someone who is neither religious nor a prude.
I’m finding it difficult to difficult to find the words to challenge this, as it is just plain and simply wrong.
I was sent a few very disturbing written articles on this very situation in Afghanistan, old men marrying young girls of 8, 9, 10 as a ways of the young child’s family covering debts, or repaying debts?
Are we just a commodity world, where money can now buy you sex with a child, making it legal, by simply attaching the matrimony certificate?,
A way to “make it seem normal and right”? Do we no longer have any scruples or judgement to define normality?
Many questions come into question when dealing with these issues. The consequences for these young girls is just horrific. What must go through their minds?, as even a young child knows and understands this IS wrong. Besides the pain of constant rape of their little bodies, the psychological pain and fear must be beyond imagination.
But Karel, it is clearly stated that Mahommed took young brides, Aisha being his youngest at 9 and his favourite. This was their “spiritual leader”, the nations example to acceptability, so we see the depth of this sexual corruption and why it continues, un -challenged. Men have put these religious leaders in place, with rules to suit the male and his perversities, written into the Koran, we realise how deep set this problem really is, young boys growing up knowing and seeing what they may one day inherit. Like a “closed society” of perverse males looking after their own, to curb the wandering sexual urges, they just legalise it, saves having to deal with mass rape.
Where do the adult women fit into this?. Is this just a “lack of moral judgement”?, severe submission?, fear of men?.
One cannot fathom out, unless more in -depth studies are done to get to the root of it. Of course this would also not be believable seeing as the psychiatric association now believes it to be an orientation not a perversion.
So, are young girls doomed to a life of “legalised pedophilia”? I believe so, sadly, as intervention into these matters would most likely require another war.
I try desperately to keep an open mind, to believe we have the means to unravel these serious issues, then my mind swings away to the negative and the reality of it.
Bottom line, if we do not allow healthy interaction between male/female from a young age, we force suppression and shut off their natural desires, we have trouble. Males will rape, find alternatives.
Rape is also extreme frustration, many women would disagree with me, as rape has many forms, I do understand this, but many nations disallow any interaction between male/female unless they are married. So the mind becomes the weapon, eventuating in violence or perversion.
I could go more into depth of all of these issues, but where do we draw the line on perversion against acceptability?
By allowing the natural desires from youth to connect naturally between the sexes.

Reply
- Karel Donk October 31st, 2013 at 4:38 pm
  
  They are taking the easy way out by taking care of symptoms again instead of the root cause, which I describe in my post above. When you think about it, pedophilia is a sexual preference, but it’s just not a desirable one. What needs to happen is that we need to fix the things that lead to people developing such preferences (also including homosexuality etc.).
  
  Bottom line, if we do not allow healthy interaction between male/female from a young age, we force suppression and shut off their natural desires, we have trouble. Males will rape, find alternatives.
  
  That’s the essence of the problem right there. That is what needs to be taken care of. The only thing I would add is that also females will rape and/or find alternatives.
  
  And with regard to religion, that and the whole social system we live in was enforced upon us thousands of years ago in order to divide us and weaken us, so that we’d be easily controlled and manipulated. I discuss this in the 2nd part and the 3rd part of my Understanding Women series. But a good book on the background of this is “Slave species of the gods” by Michael Tellinger. And they did a great job if you ask me. If, as a species, we cannot even connect with each other in a healthy way at the most fundamental level — which is between the sexes — then we’re doomed.
  
  Reply
Sharon Mather November 1st, 2013 at 3:18 am

mmmm..I am sure a retracted statement due to the outcry…never the less it still does not clarify adequately the perverseness of this affliction.
As with homosexuality, which also in my view, a perversive affliction of the sexual orientation, thou I am accepting of this, however it will always remain an unnatural deviation from the norm. A perversion.
i absolutely agree with you Karel, that we cannot connect with each other at the most basic levels of human needs, these issues need addressing if we are to see even a slight improvement between the sexes.
Lets face it, how many men if given the chance to be honest, would admit most marriages end for this exact reason, lack of sex and touch. To understand why men choose to engage with children can have many meanings, maybe men who have never had the opportunity to experiment through puberty, through lack of the opportunity or worse still, young girls separated from males until commitment ie marriage.
When we see some of the Latin races, who are allowed to engage and experiment against the Indian men, who cannot, we see a difference in attitudes towards sex and touch. Inexperienced Indian men are rough, desperate and self inclined towards satisfaction. And many Indian ladies have told me this. This attitude causes the women to switch off and snub sex, annoying the already frustrated male further to violence.
For love to be real, sensuality is required. The art of love is nurtured, slowly is a requirement of all women and men.
This shows us, the importance of attachment. If men and women were programmed to early division, sexuality would be a naturally delayed act, which of course we know it is not.
Religion to me is the biggest cause of division between the sexes, allowing the males to control completely, and women to accept the submissive frustrated role.
I have constantly stressed all these points in discussions for solutions to sexual violence as well as perverse attitudes. I am always alone in this fight, to get recognition for repairing these issues, in dealing from the early years.
All these studies do is to address the problem after the atrocity, when we already know it is through control and manipulation. Denial being the further cause to misunderstandings.
Treat the root cause, allow comfortable connections with youth, in an open and accepting attitude.
Let them decide when they are ready.

Reply
Karel Donk November 15th, 2013 at 2:32 pm

This is what happens in a sexually repressed society:

Former NFL cheerleader tries to give 12-year-old oral sex, gets probation
A former Tennessee Titans cheerleader trapped a 12-year-old boy in a bathroom, grabbed his penis and attempted to give him oral sex. She was sentenced to 18-months probation because the American justice system gives zero f-cks about women raping boys.

Elizabeth Garner was arrested in March of this year after following a boy into the bathroom at a party hosted by the boy’s mother.

Garner allegedly then grabbed the boy’s penis over his shorts … and attempted to remove them in order to perform oral sex on him. According to police, the boy said Garner asked if he’d ever been with a woman. Garner later told police she thought the boy was someone else (a grown man).

Yeah, let’s flip that story around for a second. NFL player follows 12-year-old girl into the bathroom, forces himself on her. Tells police he thought the 12-year-old was a grown woman.

What. The. Fuck.

Reply
- Sharon Mather November 16th, 2013 at 4:50 am
  
  Really Karel..I just cannot believe sexual repression causes men to become so disgusting in thought Seriously, in my view after reading this male page, leads me to believe this is pure perversion nothing more.
  As these insidious and totally sick remarks certainly do not apply to the norm of society, from a female point of view, no woman in her right mind would be remotely attracted to this sick and perverse mind.
  If we are to bridge the gap to connecting male/female, considering the mass destruction between the sexes currently on full view to the world, and the lack of trust from both sides, continued disrespect and accusations of bestiality involving women, certainly will increase the gap.
  This is plain smut, and if the desperation is so extreme from males, then I am afraid, they need refocusing, because I for one think this description is completely off key.
  The real issues once rape is under control, is re -educating both males and females on expectations, not perversity.
  Lastly, how do we define male rape? Because what I read above, is not rape.
  Rape is pure violence, and I see no violence here
  I may have a totally different outlook and defining of what rape is to you, but to me a young boy of 12 being introduced by an older women to the pleasure of oral sex is not rape. Out there, yes, but not rape.
  Lets focus on decent sensual love and stay away from perverse bent males who thinks fucking women and calling women bitches is normal.
  Respect and freedom to engage in the simple pleasures needs addressing
  My view only
  
  Reply
  - Karel Donk November 16th, 2013 at 2:00 pm
    
    Yes, sexual repression causes humans in general to develop really perverse thoughts. See footnote 3 above. And there are many women who are attracted to sick and perverse minds. Of course what is considered “sick and perverse” will vary with every person. But I know of many women who love things like SM and look at how women go crazy for 50 Shades of Grey. I would also recommend watching a movie called “A Dangerous Method” which will show you what kind of influence sexual repression has on women, and how it warps their sexual preferences.
    
    As for the 12 year old boy, normally I wouldn’t see it as rape, but in this case it seems the woman forced him into it, locking him up etc. I think as long as it’s against his will it’s abuse. I assume this was against his will. As I mentioned in my article above in footnote 4, even children have sexual needs, and in the cases where you have older women who have sex with younger boys out of their free will, and especially if there is love involved, I think there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. There are many such cases, and right now if the authorities find out they lock those women up. And as I mentioned, this is absurd and it needs to stop. As long as nobody is forced or misled into it, and people act out of their own free will, they should be able to satisfy their sexual desires, even if they are under aged.
    
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    - Sharon Mather November 16th, 2013 at 2:50 pm
      
      If put into this context I agree to a certain extent, but we have to be very careful how we define rape, as this is a real problem globally for women at the moment, actually it has been for a very long time, generations in fact, and trying to define it and stop it has been an ongoing problem for many generations. Reason I felt it important to bring it up.
      There is a very strong line here between rape and sexual cohesion between the sexes.
      Of course as we know there is perversity on both sides of the sexes, but this is in no way the norm more circumstantial and certainly can cause warped concepts to reality, however this I still feel is more the minority here.
      50 shades of grey is boring as many women will tell you, so not even worth a mention here, unless the mind is desperate, an educated and insightful mind would understand that, unless maybe if you’re 80 and lonely.
      Willing is never rape, forced is rape, and if there are to consensual people involved in a sexual act, fine, as long as the consequences are taken into consideration.
      No matter how one looks at it, male rape has to have some consensual agreement, one cannot rape a man unless he is willing, and no amount of convincing would make me feel otherwise. With high statistics in child pornography, child slavery and all the other perverse actions now against children, protecting children is now high priority. But perverse adults have some other dysfunctional aspects to their upbringing as all research has shown clearly, so now as we progress to exposing these elements of the human mind in more depth and trying to find solutions in answer, we definitely need to understand the difference between a sick and perverse mind and what we call a normal healthy outlook to sex.
      One cannot and should never mix the two, rather educating and allowing normal interaction between the sexes through puberty should be more encouraged as to form a healthy and happy necessity to life.
      Humans by nature possess a kink, it is how this kink is nurtured that determines the outcome.
      Bestiality is as abnormal and perverse as one can get, best left in the past with the Romans and Caligula.
    - Karel Donk November 16th, 2013 at 8:25 pm
      
      Perverse adults are that way because of sexual repression in society. Nobody is born with perverse needs; they are created. So I also don’t think that humans have a kink by nature. Kinks are a product of suppression and repression of their natural sexual needs. Again this is mentioned in footnote 3 above. Prevent people from being able to satisfy their natural sexual needs whenever they feel like it, and you damage them mentally. So the problem is not people, but the system they live in.
      And it is possible to rape a man, and those instances do occur. Just google it.
    - Sharon Mather November 17th, 2013 at 1:52 am
      
      You are correct Karel…it certainly makes sense..
      When I stated a man cannot be raped..I should have emphasised by a female..but yes men can be raped..and the rape is normally committed by another male. In war many males are raped..but the majority of rape is committed by males against females.
      Yes we do have some really bad issues through sexual repression.
      If we are to see any results..these issue need to come out in to the open as we are doing..but we must always remember..rape is an issue not related to suppression but violence. In India and Africa..the highest statistics for rape..we see very a strong separation of sexes as well as very dominant males..so there has to be some connection there to the beginnings of frustration for men.
      Kinky is kinky..and many do not come from suppressed families..I believe religions play a big part in perversity…
      Interesting we can speak about these issues..collaborating our ideas..I also research a lot on all these issues..and have found religion to be the basis of many problems relating to frustration and ager.
    - Karel Donk November 17th, 2013 at 3:24 pm
      
      But men can be raped by females, and they are. I know it might be difficult to believe but there are many such cases that you can find on Google. As for India, the violence is a result of sexual suppression as well. The things you mention, like strong separation of sexes and religion, are in place to enable sexual suppression. And footnote 3 above predicts what is going to happen in such cases: you get extreme violence and extreme behavior.
      The key thing to understand what’s going on here is that all the double standards in society with regard to sex and love, the suppression of sexual desires via religion, all the written and unwritten rules with regard to sex and relationships in society, are all put in place for 1 reason: to suppress our sexual desires and prevent us from satisfying them. And the reason for this was: control and manipulation of the human species. It’s the ultimate example of divide and conquer. We were divided at the very core, the basic and most important way in which we can connect with each other as a species, and that is between the sexes. I discuss this in part 3 of my Understanding Women series.
    - Sharon Mather November 17th, 2013 at 7:16 pm
      
      Absolutely, so…where to now?
      How do we reverse this situation?
      How do we educate these nations?
      Where the majority of the world continues to worship religions, calling it tradition?, knowing the word marriage is so outdated and impossible under these so called suppressed attitudes, the Catholic Church still dominating 80% of the worlds population, we see how difficult it is to change attitudes.
      Divide and conquer is more in line. Priming young girls for the satisfaction of old men is spreading, which brings me to the question, who in fact is allowing this?…women…and why?
      So we can actually delve deeper here to find out why women are allowing this?..selling their young daughters for the pleasure of men.
      Why?
      What I face daily in my writings is absolutely frightening, the stories of nightmares, and I struggle to understand how we can possibly swing this around and educate on the facts.
      Where do we start?..my view is with the youth, if we are allowed to pry them away from the parents, who dominate and rule without compassion.
      Certainly there is a massive problem here, however in other areas such as GM there is now a showing of success amongst the Masai people, with an entire youth almost entirely free from this cruel procedure.
      So all possibilities are there if we are determined enough to educate sensibly.
      So instead of all of us simply crying out about atrocities of divisions amongst the sexes, let us all be active in collaborating for change.
      This is the real difficulty, getting people active from shocked to aware to action.
      Only then…will we see change.
    - Karel Donk November 17th, 2013 at 8:31 pm
      
      Yep absolutely, we should all collaborate for change. One of the most important things we need to do is spread this information about what is really going on so that people can first understand how they are being misled. Then change will come automatically. Even if the older generation can’t or don’t want to change their mind, the information will reach the younger generation, and they will change the world. But we need to give them the info, write, make documentaries, publish books etc. etc.
    - Sharon Mather November 18th, 2013 at 12:56 am
      
      Absolutely..and this is my work..this is exactly what I do..inform and educate the youth for change.
      I have seen great steps forward and amazingly from the very countries that have seen the greatest control. Youth are now standing up and using their voices, for the first time they are openly defining their needs.
      I am encouraged to see this, however the Western world lags behind in many areas, most importantly collaboration with other Cultural groups. Through lack of knowledge or simple ambiguity or vagueness to understanding, this bridge is going to be the difficult to cross. I am finding an intense willingness to reach out to other cultures, from the ones who have known the most pain, a thirst to know more and to educate the true realities of their situation.
      So much has been warped and misinterpreted by Western society for to long, so youth are the only option to put these issues into proper perspective. I have great belief this will happen, however i order to, they had to denounce old values that no longer hold truth to them. this is already happening globally, as I engage in discussions with them and help connect them with the outside world.
      I have many wonderful proposals ready, waiting for funding, global villages and safe houses, all amazing ideas, yet we wait and apply for any funding.
      It is sad on one hand, that we the ones who do care, seems to battle to get the organisations that fund to understand and focus on the youth. The red tape, rules and regulations block many of our initiatives, but we are growing in strength
      We refuse to be silent by an ostentatiously rich few, intent on continuing the power game of control
      Yes, exposing these issues is paramount
      Strength in numbers is indeed a powerful weapon for change
      http://voicesofwomenworldwide-vowwtv.ning.com
Sabine McNeill March 6th, 2015 at 9:04 am

Hm, what a far, wide and deep reaching article, Karel!!!

Puts together what I’ve gone through in a whole life time:

1. co-founded the European Association for Humanistic Psychology after I studied Reich among many others

2. I published http://www.victims-unite.net and discovered child snatching aka ‘state kidnapping’ as the most heinous of all white collar crimes

3. I realised there was ‘method, purpose and policy’ behind the systems of organisations that lead from child snatching and forced adoptions to child sexual exploitation.

4. the latest case with the ‘whistleblower kids’ telling their stories is distinctly what tops it all off: https://whistleblowerkids.wordpress.com/ and the petition with which I started.

I thought it’s our “inner child” that needs healing to prevent sexual aberrations. But I’m not so sure any more. In any case, an inner and self-reflecting life is required to get anywhere in terms of responsibility towards self and others, methinks.

With best wishes for more and more power to your blogging and coding elbows,
Sabine

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